Closing Doors

Yesterday I received a stock pick via email. The simple recommendation sent me into a blue funk for the rest of the evening as it was a reminder of a bad stock pick I made last year. Instead of choosing x, I chose y. Instead of making money on the investment, I lost money. The memory of this decision bothered me so much that I actually spent the evening calculating how much money this bad investment cost me compared to how much I would have made if I'd chosen the other stock. Reliving the event was all the more painful because at the moment I am unemployed and living off of my savings, which means that had I made the correct choice, I would have made enough money to literally pay for this year.

This thought was compounded by my recent sad experience with Joyce Van Lines, the moving company that brought my belongings to Colorado. Despite my careful research and choice of an A rated company, I ended up with a moving experience that cost more than double what I'd originally estimated. The anxiety I felt over this, the arguments I had with the moving company, cost me two weeks of sleepless nights before Christmas.

And finally there was a disappointing weekend when my current weight issues, my age, my insecurities about my accomplishments and current standing in life all came to a head and left me wondering just where I was going and what I was doing. Not a great a December.

But what I have been trying to remind myself for the past day is that all of that is now behind me. With the start of the New Year, I have a choice, I can continue to dwell on these incidents and carry the sadness of their recollection with me as I move forward. Or I can learn from each event, and choose to close the door, put those events behind me and move forward a bit wiser, and with an optimistic outlook for the future. I won't pretend it's easy to let go of these unfortunate events, I tend to be one who ruminates. But I also realize that if I am to make progress this year, I have to close the door on the past year and look forward.