15 May
This morning I woke at 4 a.m. worried that I have not been doing enough, that I am in the same place that I was a year ago, that I want to move to Incline Village, but that I am being foolish and should (still) choose a cheaper place (though I do seem able to afford to rent a house there and contacted an agent to inquire about two of them today), that I have not revised my resume yet becaue I don't know how to write one for a job I've never had(in books) but want, rather than one that I don't (in sales) which I've had, that I have not found a job yet because I haven't completed that resume, that there are many more qualified, wiser people 'out there' who will be able to get a job, career, home before me. And that the anxiety of trying to figure out which of these things to complete first (while admonishing myself for not completing any of them yet) is causing me great heaps of anxiety which wake me at 4 a.m.
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